Read their history. No church splits. No elder purges. No commitments to loyalty. No disastrous front-page headlines. No slavery. No pastor pleading leniency for sex predators. No imaginary enemies called “intoleristas.”
Many former kirkers have found peace there. You can too. 8:30, 10:00, and 11:30 am.
May I suggest that if you are a current CC member, just leave. You do not need to give anyone an answer to leave and many times it becomes an emotional tug-of-war if you do. I’ve been studying spiritual abuse and personal stories for the last 4-5 years. Leaving is often the most difficult thing to do. Just vote with your feet and don’t look back. You can do it. My blog deals with spiritual abuse and it’s a good “hang out” place for those recovering and trying to get back on their feet emotionally and spiritually.
Well said, Julie Anne.
I was a member of another Christ Church (in Kirkland, WA) which had similar issues, and I had signed a membership agreement that stated I was supposed to get the pastor’s permission to be released. I just left. The pastor was eventually forced out, and the church has rebranded itself in an attempt to erase its tainted history.
God is not in a box, nor is He confined to your church or denomination.
Or if you’re not ready to leave, why not just visit a couple of other churches?
While I share the negative view of Doug Wilson that others do and think Kirkers should go elsewhere, it’s also true I sat under his teaching for many years. It wasn’t until I moved to Moscow that I saw the problems, and even then, it took some time. But Doug was not always wrong in what he wrote, and he did say one time that the “aroma” of a home is sometimes not noticed by those living in it. They get used to the peculiar smells or odors. By aroma he meant the behavior and attitudes of the people.
So if you are a CC member and are not ready to take Julie Anne’s advice and leave, you could always visit a few other churches first. It’s quite possible that after that you return to the Kirk you will notice what you did not notice before — the smell of legalism, of oppression, of dishonesty, of hypocrisy, of hate, of fear, of joylessness. And then you can leave for good.
Frank, it’s interesting how Doug speaks words of truth mixed in with harmful words, actions, behavior. The idea of aroma being familiar is so true. It’s when you give yourself a little distance from the aroma, that you can tell whether it is a pleasant smell or a stench. The more I ventured away from the cult, I realized the cult was more like a pigsty. Now the stench is putrid, I can see the controlling and abusive patterns clearly. The words aired in public are just words, because the actions show rotten fruit that only pigs would eat. It’s amazing that we can live in something like that and not see it clearly. That shows the power of someone who is crafty, conniving, and who creeps in unknown, just as the Bible speaks of spiritual wolves.
I would never, ever sign a membership contract with a church, ever, under any circumstances for any reason. F*%k that noise. Nobody gets to have power over me, not nobody, not no-how, especially not voluntarily. *ESPECIALLY* not a useless bloated windbag like Doug Wilson.
I’d like to vote with my feet, all right. I’d like to see how far I can stuff my boot all up in Doug Wilson’s ass. I’d like to beat him stupid, not that he’s very smart to begin with.